It’s been awhile everybody. But I have always enjoyed writing and between the last time I wrote until now a lot has changed.
Since being back from Kona HI serving with YWAM for the past few years I sure did learn a lot, fall in love with Jesus Christ and made incredible friends around the world that will last a lifetime. Something I realized was how common it was that I would meet people from YWAM having such a difficult time readjusting to life some desperate to understand what God’s calling was on their lives. I have also met some that flourished upon arriving home and immediately joined ministries or university with a bright look on the future.
It seems I fell into the category of the first. Readjusting was the single most difficult experience of my life, but what I came to notice was just how much God still needed to do in my heart. Also, it was time to MOVE ON with my life and pursue Jesus. Going home doesn’t mean going back to normal, but I saw it that way. Through working menial jobs, feeling torn about going to school, missing my closest friends and not being fully immersed in a ministry I felt disconnected and out of place and I know I’m not alone. So I began to fight for community and sought change in my life. I realized there’s just too many Christians stuck in this “funk.” Instead of believing The Gospel and carrying the word of the Lord with faith in my life I was trying to figure out why my everything wasn’t going the way I wanted. Have you ever met someone who just wasn’t thriving because when you ask them about their life all they do is complain? I firmly believe now more than ever that God wants us to thrive in any circumstance.
Since I have been abroad two times this summer in Nepal serving with relief work with YWAMer’s and Jos Nigeria working with a medical team aiming to make healthcare in Nigeria a reality through Gods love, started a worship ministry called The Living Room and am now a Junior High Director at Auburn Grace Church. Once I stopped complaining and just sought getting right with God, things fell into place in a way that is hard to describe. Being home really has become better than I ever could have imagined and then some, but it took a whole lot of wasted time to come to this conclusion.
What I learned: God wants to meet with me and it is in now way dictated by where I am. I can have the fullest intimacy with Jesus as long as I am meeting with Him daily and establishing myself in His word. His plans for me are not on my timeline and He desires to have all of me not just more of what I do. I have to get vicious about removing all hindrances from my life and do WHATEVER it takes to get right with Him. Instead of moving around because I don’t know what God wants me to do and I am unsatisfied, maybe there is breakthrough of the heart that is needed therefore causing these things and I need to confront them head on.
How to move forward with God: Planting yourself in opportunities where you will be challenged, seeking new relationships and fresh perspective from God to try new things. Serve in a ministry that pushes your limits and spur others on to get in God’s presence. Keeping God’s word the basis of your life and praying in moments when reading seems dull, “God I don’t want you right now, but I want to want you!” Bringing community around myself is most definitely one of the biggest ways I have grown closer to God. Putting ourselves out there is scary, but the benefits of having iron in your life will sharpen you and push you closer to Jesus.
Finally, if it’s always about God healing you and you are not gaining the tools to move forward and grow in Christ there is something wrong. Healing is necessary and vital to God filing in the gaps in our lives, but we must equip and push ourselves to move forward to have more of God. I am constantly meeting young, middle aged, and older men and women who are not satisfied with their walk with God and have a negative outlook on our world. While we are wondering where God is, many are living out the Great Commission preaching The Gospel, healing the sick, casting out demons and loving others. A surrendered heart that says YES to Jesus are more powerful than 100 people serving God not from a place of love, but for the sake of works. My eyes are ever bright toward the future only because I am living in the present. I am growing, learning, failing, getting up knowing God is proud of me and He always sees my heart in trying when it is rooted in love. I am so glad for my past experiences and know many things will come together again, but for right now, God here and now is more than I could ask for!